Welcome to the 7th Annual Publican Enemy End of Year Pub Awards- the P.E.E.YP.A’s!! As is customary, we kick off the the Pub Grub Round.

If music be the food of love, then mathematically , love must be the music of food ….. so , yeah …. in 2025, alongside visiting every Irish Pub on earth, I for one know it’s crucial to (a) test out the local delicacies when abroad and (b) have a bit of food before pints, for god’s sake lads. Attempting to visit Every Irish Pub in the world requires a complex blend of essential nutrients, vitamins and crisps, so here are the best foods that I and my colleagues ate before , during and after pub visitations. Remember, eating is never cheating, and dining is fine-ing.

10. Polenta :

Think of all the amazing regional variations of Italian food, the sheer range of ingredients, flavours , textures and ingenious use of local produce, and you never think of polenta. Staple of Northern Italy, Polenta may lose out as it tastes of actual nothing. But therein lies its strength. I had this four nights in a row by mistake, from the fried slices version , to the creamy mash one , to a street stall reclaiming the derogatory ‘Polentone’ insult into a thriving business. Approveto!

9. Tommy’s Tuck in Cafe: Full English

The fry up is having a resurgence, and this particular grease pit lingers in the memory. Side by side with the fetishisation of Guinness/ Irish Pubs is the greasy spoon, and I am a staunch supporter. Normalize chips as well.

8. Carniolan Sausage, Slovenia

Slovenia is lovely, but bless ’em they’re not particularly world- renowned for anything. That’s probably what makes it such a peaceful and stable land; they don’t have to enter any dick-swinging contest about having the best Olive Oil, or the juiciest turnips. And lo, their national dish is a really really good sausage. No frills. No lofty claims. Just a sausage with a bitta’ bread, mustard and horseradish. Deceptively exhilarating. Which should be the tourist board slogan. That or the one I came up with at 2 AM – ”Take your time- it’s SLO-venia……not Fast-venia.”

7. Caldera Meat Plate, Trieste, Italia

Trieste may be Italian but for years it was the port of the Austrian Hapsburg empire, and with those pesky-inbreds came cafe culture, beer steins and ridiculous hearty boiled meat und sauerkraut combos. The Caldera (Cauldron) plates emerged from the Buffets, low budget canteens designed for hard working dockers to stock up on carbs. I was all up for this dish , but once your on to your 5th boiled sausage accompanied by ham, ham hock, bacon, pork and 2 other sausages, unless your gonna be on the waterfront lugging crates, it’s too much ham for any one man. I spend a frenzied night trying to digest all of this Porcine Armageddon.

6. Kohuke Cheese Curd Snack, Estonia

Does what it says. It is undoubtedly a Kohuke Cheese Curd snack. No doubt scores of minuscule wrapped-up Baltic babies rejoiced when they saw a Kohuke Cheese Curd snack in their lunch boxes. As well they should. Is covered in chocolate but is technically a cheese.

5. Cott0letta Milanese :

A fried Elephants ear of joy, the Milanese specialty of possible Austrian origins. A big ole bashed bit of Veal covered in crispy crumbs, spanning the entire plate with it’s magnificence. Right up my strada.

4. Olympia Burek & Yoghurt. Ljubljana:

As a history – enjoyer, you can usually trace the movement of peoples through simple street food. The burek famously hails from Turkey, or Turkiye, and so good was their delicacy, hundreds of years after the disintegration of the Ottoman empire, the Balkans can’t resist its pastry cheesy charms. This one is an absolute delight, as you queue up among tourists offices workers and builders to spend £3 on a fresh baked spiral of deliciousness. Worry not about getting it with spinach, cheese or mince- they’re all good. I oft wonder why Ireland , whilst we adopted fish and chips and the Sunday roast, never adopted Yorkshire Puddings. It’s because they’re shite. Score extra Yugo-points by enjoying your Burek with a yoghurt drink , and savour the taste of one of Europe’s mightiest fallen empires whilst covered in flakes and crumbs.

3. Aperitvo, Milano :

Whilst technically not a food, the Milanese apperitivo is the apex of class and sophistication. If you give me crisps , for free, I will sing your name to the heavens. Opt always for the Aperol spritz, and shun the risible ‘Spritz Bianco’ (white wine with a bit of soda water) ,and sit back as you live like some sort of Rockefeller. Just don’t lick the crisp dust with your fingers, yeah?

2. Ossobucco & Risotto:

You, gesticulating wildly: ‘Pizza , pasta , mamma mia!”

Me , a sophisticate: ‘I’ll have the Ossobucco & Risotto’

This Milanese staple, where rice trumps pasta and light salad gives way to hearty chunks of veal, the bone with a hole delishousness of this Lombardian specialty is far superior to any pizza dish imaginable.

1 and a half: Spice Bag, Mc & Sons

All the best fine dining comes from out of a bag. Culinary fusion at it’s finest and now taking over the UK, served for you to graze like a horse, it’s the Spice Bag. Mc & Sons provide not just consistently good pints and pubs, but their Thai food is a step above the average. Add in a Thai influenced curry sauce, so good it should be sold by the pint.

1. Coddle, The Gravediggers, Dublin

A late, last minute win for the misunderstood stew of the moment, the Dublin classic of Coddle, served at the Gravediggers pub, Glasnevin. This contentious dish is much maligned by jealous culchies who are loathe to admit anything decent can come from Dublin. But as of 2 days ago, I took a trip to that site of pilgrimage, Heaven in Glasnevin, Kavanagh’s- the Gravediggers. Amongst their commendable Irish Tapas list is the inimitable Coddle. Consisting of everything that is pure and wholesome, spuds, carrots, ham, sausages and pork rib, it is the star of the Irish Cucina Povera. Only cowards would be dissuaded by the pink-ness of the sausages within. Goes well with a Guinness. Which is lucky, considering where you are. Buladh bos mor.